When you’re living life at 200 MPH, it can be very easy to forget the fact that you’re the reflection of your own experiences. Your past, your childhood, and your relationships are all part of who you are today, and the reason behind your actions.

The reactions you give to certain situations, the fear of commitment, and the seclusion you tend to prefer when life gets stressful: All stem from the traumas and thought patterns you’ve adopted since you were young.

And when we forget that, we tend to lose connection with ourselves, find no meaning in our actions, and wonder why we tend to feel scared when anyone tries to come closer to us. It’s not only about relationships too, but you might also carry the same set of doubts, second-guesses, and fears into your professional and academic life too, keeping yourself from reaching the goals that you set!

Most self-saboteurs find themselves in a closed loop that begins with avoiding important tasks due to conscious procrastination, second-guessing themselves out of taking action, and then feeling frustrated and disappointed with themselves for doing so.

That feeling of frustration then pours into other activities, causing them to always remain stuck in that loop.

That is what the concept of self-sabotage entails, how one stops their own self from reaching the goals or happiness they strive for, and the state of conflict that puts them in.

Where Does Self-Sabotage Start?

Self-sabotage is self-explanatory. It happens when your own thoughts, actions, and behaviors stop you from reaching the goals you had in mind, regardless of their scale or nature. You find yourself asking the same questions: “Why am I doing this?”, “What’s happening to me?”, “Why can’t I catch a break?” over and over again, and that’s where you realize that you don’t truly understand the driving force behind your actions.

Many people associate self-sabotage with impostor syndrome, which is where you constantly doubt the fact that you deserve what you have and the life you live. It tends to stem from a childhood where they were criticized, thus growing into harsh, critical adults.

Signs You’re Self-Sabotaging Without Even Knowing It.

Many people think that the main driving forces for self-sabotage are fear and doubt, however, another underlying factor is control.

Whenever self-sabotagers feel like they’re losing control, they tend to “protect” themselves by taking back control of the situation.

It’s very apparent in relationships, for those with a fear of attachment and abandonment, the self-sabotaging behavior can lead many people shutting their partners out, rejecting vulnerability, and in more extreme cases, cheating on their partners to have an excuse to leave them or to be left by their partner.

Another example lies in communication, as self-saboteurs tend to avoid direct confrontation and may choose to gain validation in more harmful ways, such as making their partner jealous or triggered.

In any case, you can see how self-sabotage has an element of control deep down underneath the layers of fear.

Self-sabotaging is an indirect way to regain a false sense of control when they’re operating purely on fear, and it can be seen in the form of unhealthy attachment, tricking themselves into doing things they don’t want, or “testing” others through manipulation.

This can also be applied to relationships and friendships, as most self-saboteurs find themselves doubting the authenticity of their friendships, and always assume that the other side views them as annoying, clingy, or overbearing.

How To Stop The Self-sabotage Cycle And Come To Terms With Your Actions.

The journey to stop self-sabotaging begins with acknowledgment. Many people choose to remain in denial and refuse to accept the fact that they could be the reason behind their lack of progress.

However, self-awareness initiates the introspection process, which allows us to identify our own toxic actions, thought patterns, and fears, which in turn helps us stop doing them and replace them with more positive actions.

Practicing positive self-talk is also a very important step in the right direction, as the most effective way of replacing negative thoughts is to echo what we need to hear in our own minds.

Closure And Your Next Step.

I hope this article serves as your first step towards a self-sabotage-free life and allows you to acknowledge the actions you’ve been consciously or unconsciously doing to stop your own progress.

In today's hyper-competitive job market, introverted job seekers face a daunting challenge - how to stand out among the multitude of resumes submitted to every company. With social media saturated with content creators, it's a challenging time to distinguish yourself. It's crucial to embrace the principle of realizing your power and claiming your confidence.

For an extrovert, showcasing your confidence may be more natural than it is for an introvert. So how does one go about realizing their power so they can compete in today's market?

#1 Define Your Unique Value Proposition

According to a recent study, 70% of recruiters use LinkedIn to screen candidates, and 92% of hiring managers use social media to assess job seekers. Therefore, it's essential to develop a unique value proposition that differentiates yourself from the competition. Identify your skills, experiences, and personality traits that make one a compelling candidate and convey these attributes through an optimized LinkedIn profile, resume, and cover letter.

#2 Leverage Your Network

Networking is the primary means of securing a job, with 85% of all positions filled through networking. Networking can take many forms, from reconnecting with former colleagues to attending industry events and joining LinkedIn groups. By tapping into your network and developing new connections, you can gain access to job opportunities that may not be advertised publicly.

#3 Develop a Strong Personal Brand

According to a recent survey, 70% of employers use social media to screen candidates, making it essential to develop a strong personal brand. Develop a consistent brand message across all social media platforms, showcasing your skills, experience, and personality. By sharing valuable content and engaging with your audience, you can build a reputation as a thought leader in your field.

#4 Focus on Professional Development

It's crucial to keep your skills and knowledge up to date. By investing in professional development, you can learn new skills, gain new insights, and stay ahead of the competition. Employers value candidates who are committed to continuous learning and growth, so it's essential to showcase your professional development on your resume and LinkedIn profile.

#5 Prepare for Job Interviews

Interviews are a critical part of the job search process, and preparation is essential. Research the company, review the job description, and prepare specific examples of how your skills and experiences align with the requirements of the role. By practicing interview skills and honing your communication style, you will make a positive impression and stand out from the competition.

Research from the NeuroLeadership Institute has shown that introverts and extroverts may have different experiences during the hiring process. While extroverts may excel in job interviews and networking events, introverts may struggle to convey their strengths and abilities in these settings. However, introverts may shine in written communication, such as cover letters and email correspondences. Therefore, job seekers should play to their strengths and use the hiring process to their advantage.

By implementing these five tips and playing to strengths, job seekers can differentiate themselves from the competition and increase their chances of securing their dream job. Remember to stay focused, stay positive, and stay committed to your goals, and success will surely follow.

If you're looking for even more support in your career journey, join Our Highest Mantra, a community of like-minded individuals dedicated to personal and professional growth. Visit our website today to learn more and take the next step in realizing your full potential.

In healthcare, a critical demographic has been consistently making 90% of healthcare decisions: women. This influential group not only drives the healthcare decisions for themselves but often for their families, making them the cornerstone of consumer health and wellness engagement. Despite their undeniable impact, 66% of women feel misunderstood by the healthcare market. This discrepancy raises a crucial question: why is there such a significant gap in understanding the needs of the majority of the healthcare market's decision-makers?

The answer lies in the representation at the highest levels of the companies that shape the healthcare industry. Currently, only 15% of women hold CEO positions in the sector. This underrepresentation at the leadership level creates a disconnect between those who make the decisions and those for whom the decisions are made. As the CEO of PIROOZ, I am acutely aware of the importance of bridging this gap. Our company is committed to recognizing and amplifying the voice of the female consumer in healthcare and in wellness. It is a strategic imperative for industry-wide success.

The significant influence of women in healthcare decisions is mirrored in their proactive approach to seeking health and wellness information. Research shows that 9 out of 10 women go online to find this crucial data, demonstrating their active role in managing health and wellness. Despite their engagement and spending power, the feeling of being misunderstood points to a larger issue within the healthcare industry: a lack of targeted, responsive strategies that address the specific needs and concerns of women.

Women's majority share in consumer spending further underscores their role as key stakeholders in not only healthcare but in the global economy. Controlling over $31.8 trillion in worldwide spending, women's economic influence is undeniable. Yet, the persistent cycle of exclusion from critical leadership roles in industries where they are the primary consumers is incongruent with their market impact. This historical oversight is not just a missed opportunity for gender equality but a strategic misstep for companies aiming to thrive in a competitive marketplace.

The narrative that "the future is female" goes beyond politics and steps into a broader economic reality. Acknowledging this trend isn't just about embracing diversity for its own sake; it's a recognition of where the majority of the world's purchasing power resides. As industries, including healthcare, continue to evolve, understanding and addressing the needs of women will be crucial to crafting strategies that are inclusive, effective, and responsive.

As the CEO of PIROOZ, I am passionate about uniting Eastern and Western health philosophies. Leading a dynamic team, our mission is to launch the world's premier media network for wellness information, connecting a community of experts and thought leaders. Our solutions platform blends Western medical insights with naturopathic, homeopathic, and Eastern wisdom, making comprehensive health knowledge and products accessible, and promoting a global understanding of wellness.

The future is not just female because of societal shifts towards gender equality; it is female because women are the primary drivers of the global economy and healthcare decisions.

When you’re living life at 200 MPH, it can be very easy to forget the fact that you’re the reflection of your own experiences. Your past, your childhood, and your relationships are all part of who you are today, and the reason behind your actions.

The reactions you give to certain situations, the fear of commitment, and the seclusion you tend to prefer when life gets stressful: All stem from the traumas and thought patterns you’ve adopted since you were young.

And when we forget that, we tend to lose connection with ourselves, find no meaning in our actions, and wonder why we tend to feel scared when anyone tries to come closer to us. It’s not only about relationships too, but you might also carry the same set of doubts, second-guesses, and fears into your professional and academic life too, keeping yourself from reaching the goals that you set!

Most self-saboteurs find themselves in a closed loop that begins with avoiding important tasks due to conscious procrastination, second-guessing themselves out of taking action, and then feeling frustrated and disappointed with themselves for doing so.

That feeling of frustration then pours into other activities, causing them to always remain stuck in that loop.

That is what the concept of self-sabotage entails, how one stops their own self from reaching the goals or happiness they strive for, and the state of conflict that puts them in.

Where Does Self-Sabotage Start?

Self-sabotage is self-explanatory. It happens when your own thoughts, actions, and behaviors stop you from reaching the goals you had in mind, regardless of their scale or nature. You find yourself asking the same questions: “Why am I doing this?”, “What’s happening to me?”, “Why can’t I catch a break?” over and over again, and that’s where you realize that you don’t truly understand the driving force behind your actions.

Many people associate self-sabotage with impostor syndrome, which is where you constantly doubt the fact that you deserve what you have and the life you live. It tends to stem from a childhood where they were criticized, thus growing into harsh, critical adults.

Signs You’re Self-Sabotaging Without Even Knowing It.

Many people think that the main driving forces for self-sabotage are fear and doubt, however, another underlying factor is control.

Whenever self-sabotagers feel like they’re losing control, they tend to “protect” themselves by taking back control of the situation.

It’s very apparent in relationships, for those with a fear of attachment and abandonment, the self-sabotaging behavior can lead many people shutting their partners out, rejecting vulnerability, and in more extreme cases, cheating on their partners to have an excuse to leave them or to be left by their partner.

Another example lies in communication, as self-saboteurs tend to avoid direct confrontation and may choose to gain validation in more harmful ways, such as making their partner jealous or triggered.

In any case, you can see how self-sabotage has an element of control deep down underneath the layers of fear.

Self-sabotaging is an indirect way to regain a false sense of control when they’re operating purely on fear, and it can be seen in the form of unhealthy attachment, tricking themselves into doing things they don’t want, or “testing” others through manipulation.

This can also be applied to relationships and friendships, as most self-saboteurs find themselves doubting the authenticity of their friendships, and always assume that the other side views them as annoying, clingy, or overbearing.

How To Stop The Self-sabotage Cycle And Come To Terms With Your Actions.

The journey to stop self-sabotaging begins with acknowledgment. Many people choose to remain in denial and refuse to accept the fact that they could be the reason behind their lack of progress.

However, self-awareness initiates the introspection process, which allows us to identify our own toxic actions, thought patterns, and fears, which in turn helps us stop doing them and replace them with more positive actions.

Practicing positive self-talk is also a very important step in the right direction, as the most effective way of replacing negative thoughts is to echo what we need to hear in our own minds.

Closure And Your Next Step.

I hope this article serves as your first step towards a self-sabotage-free life and allows you to acknowledge the actions you’ve been consciously or unconsciously doing to stop your own progress.

In today's hyper-competitive job market, introverted job seekers face a daunting challenge - how to stand out among the multitude of resumes submitted to every company. With social media saturated with content creators, it's a challenging time to distinguish yourself. It's crucial to embrace the principle of realizing your power and claiming your confidence.

For an extrovert, showcasing your confidence may be more natural than it is for an introvert. So how does one go about realizing their power so they can compete in today's market?

#1 Define Your Unique Value Proposition

According to a recent study, 70% of recruiters use LinkedIn to screen candidates, and 92% of hiring managers use social media to assess job seekers. Therefore, it's essential to develop a unique value proposition that differentiates yourself from the competition. Identify your skills, experiences, and personality traits that make one a compelling candidate and convey these attributes through an optimized LinkedIn profile, resume, and cover letter.

#2 Leverage Your Network

Networking is the primary means of securing a job, with 85% of all positions filled through networking. Networking can take many forms, from reconnecting with former colleagues to attending industry events and joining LinkedIn groups. By tapping into your network and developing new connections, you can gain access to job opportunities that may not be advertised publicly.

#3 Develop a Strong Personal Brand

According to a recent survey, 70% of employers use social media to screen candidates, making it essential to develop a strong personal brand. Develop a consistent brand message across all social media platforms, showcasing your skills, experience, and personality. By sharing valuable content and engaging with your audience, you can build a reputation as a thought leader in your field.

#4 Focus on Professional Development

It's crucial to keep your skills and knowledge up to date. By investing in professional development, you can learn new skills, gain new insights, and stay ahead of the competition. Employers value candidates who are committed to continuous learning and growth, so it's essential to showcase your professional development on your resume and LinkedIn profile.

#5 Prepare for Job Interviews

Interviews are a critical part of the job search process, and preparation is essential. Research the company, review the job description, and prepare specific examples of how your skills and experiences align with the requirements of the role. By practicing interview skills and honing your communication style, you will make a positive impression and stand out from the competition.

Research from the NeuroLeadership Institute has shown that introverts and extroverts may have different experiences during the hiring process. While extroverts may excel in job interviews and networking events, introverts may struggle to convey their strengths and abilities in these settings. However, introverts may shine in written communication, such as cover letters and email correspondences. Therefore, job seekers should play to their strengths and use the hiring process to their advantage.

By implementing these five tips and playing to strengths, job seekers can differentiate themselves from the competition and increase their chances of securing their dream job. Remember to stay focused, stay positive, and stay committed to your goals, and success will surely follow.

If you're looking for even more support in your career journey, join Our Highest Mantra, a community of like-minded individuals dedicated to personal and professional growth. Visit our website today to learn more and take the next step in realizing your full potential.

In healthcare, a critical demographic has been consistently making 90% of healthcare decisions: women. This influential group not only drives the healthcare decisions for themselves but often for their families, making them the cornerstone of consumer health and wellness engagement. Despite their undeniable impact, 66% of women feel misunderstood by the healthcare market. This discrepancy raises a crucial question: why is there such a significant gap in understanding the needs of the majority of the healthcare market's decision-makers?

The answer lies in the representation at the highest levels of the companies that shape the healthcare industry. Currently, only 15% of women hold CEO positions in the sector. This underrepresentation at the leadership level creates a disconnect between those who make the decisions and those for whom the decisions are made. As the CEO of PIROOZ, I am acutely aware of the importance of bridging this gap. Our company is committed to recognizing and amplifying the voice of the female consumer in healthcare and in wellness. It is a strategic imperative for industry-wide success.

The significant influence of women in healthcare decisions is mirrored in their proactive approach to seeking health and wellness information. Research shows that 9 out of 10 women go online to find this crucial data, demonstrating their active role in managing health and wellness. Despite their engagement and spending power, the feeling of being misunderstood points to a larger issue within the healthcare industry: a lack of targeted, responsive strategies that address the specific needs and concerns of women.

Women's majority share in consumer spending further underscores their role as key stakeholders in not only healthcare but in the global economy. Controlling over $31.8 trillion in worldwide spending, women's economic influence is undeniable. Yet, the persistent cycle of exclusion from critical leadership roles in industries where they are the primary consumers is incongruent with their market impact. This historical oversight is not just a missed opportunity for gender equality but a strategic misstep for companies aiming to thrive in a competitive marketplace.

The narrative that "the future is female" goes beyond politics and steps into a broader economic reality. Acknowledging this trend isn't just about embracing diversity for its own sake; it's a recognition of where the majority of the world's purchasing power resides. As industries, including healthcare, continue to evolve, understanding and addressing the needs of women will be crucial to crafting strategies that are inclusive, effective, and responsive.

As the CEO of PIROOZ, I am passionate about uniting Eastern and Western health philosophies. Leading a dynamic team, our mission is to launch the world's premier media network for wellness information, connecting a community of experts and thought leaders. Our solutions platform blends Western medical insights with naturopathic, homeopathic, and Eastern wisdom, making comprehensive health knowledge and products accessible, and promoting a global understanding of wellness.

The future is not just female because of societal shifts towards gender equality; it is female because women are the primary drivers of the global economy and healthcare decisions.

As a coach, I've had the privilege of witnessing the rise of power couples in today's fast-paced world. These powerhouses are often admired for their ability to juggle personal and professional success. However, the real question remains: can this dynamic truly work? In this article, we'll delve into the journey of power couples, the challenges they face, and the importance of balancing Yin and Yang energies to achieve harmony in their relationships.

Power couples are typically defined as pairs of individuals who excel in their respective careers or fields while maintaining a committed relationship. They share similar values, ambitions, and a deep emotional connection, forming a strong foundation for their partnership. This dynamic presents numerous benefits, such as increased motivation, collaboration, personal growth, and a fulfilling partnership. However, power couples face unique challenges, including balancing their personal and professional lives, navigating conflicts, and maintaining their individuality.

Embracing Yin and Yang Energies: A Power Couple's Game Changer

Let me share a story about a power couple I had the pleasure of coaching, Sarah and Mike (names changed for privacy). Both were high-achieving professionals, but their relationship was on the brink of collapse due to constant conflicts and a lack of understanding.

After a few sessions, it became apparent that the root of their problems was an imbalance in their Yin and Yang energies. Yin and Yang represent feminine and masculine qualities, not gender, and are essential for a harmonious power couple dynamic. Sarah and Mike were both exhibiting strong Yang energies, leading to a constant power struggle.

I encouraged them to embrace their Yin energies, focusing on nurturing, understanding, and collaboration. This shift in their approach transformed their relationship, allowing them to maintain harmony and balance while still achieving professional success.

The Impact of Balanced Power Couples on Society

When power couples successfully balance their Yin and Yang energies, they challenge traditional gender roles, inspire others to pursue personal and professional growth, and demonstrate the value of supportive and balanced relationships. Sarah and Mike's transformation serves as an inspiration for other power couples to embrace this energetic balance.

Navigating the Power Couple Life: Tips for Success

If you and your partner aspire to become a thriving power couple, consider these tips:

• Prioritize open communication and active listening. • Nurture both Yin and Yang energies within your relationship. • Establish boundaries between personal and professional lives. • Develop emotional intelligence skills. • Continuously invest in your relationship and support each other's growth. • Focus on collaboration and teamwork rather than competition. • Be mindful of external pressures and stay united in your decisions.

In conclusion, power couple dynamics can indeed work if both partners are willing to invest in their relationship, balance their Yin and Yang energies, and navigate the unique challenges they face. By doing so, power couples can enjoy personal and professional success while positively impacting society.

I invite you to explore the possibility of achieving harmony and success in your partnership. If you're ready to embrace a balanced and fulfilling relationship, I offer tailored coaching services designed to help couples navigate the unique challenges they face. DM me to learn more about my approach, and let's begin the journey towards creating a thriving power couple dynamic together.

Success is often measured by wealth, job titles, and material possessions. However, my human experience has led me to recognize that the essence of success lies in the energy we contribute and the impact we make, rather than in our material achievements.

Each person possesses a unique set of qualities that can positively affect the world, whether through leadership, organization, teaching, nurturing, protecting or other attributes. It's the application of these qualities in our daily activities that matters most, not the specific roles we assume. We must challenge and look beyond societal expectations and consider the real value we bring to our communities and the planet.

The relationship between fulfilling our purpose and financial gain is complex. Achieving financial success is possible when aligning with our purpose, but it shouldn't be the primary goal. Engaging in work solely for financial reasons, especially in industries that prioritize profit over people, lead to personal dissatisfaction and contribute to societal imbalances. This is evident in the discontent found among individuals who have pursued wealth at the expense of their values and well-being.

There's a reason why certain industries, like finance, are labeled as 'soulless' because they lack a soul purpose and require actions contrary to one's soul's purpose, focusing solely on monetary gain. A soul's purpose is never about accumulating wealth.

We need to redefine success to emphasize the importance of our contributions over material gain. By focusing on how our actions align with our core values, we can achieve a sense of success that is both fulfilling and sustainable. This shift requires us to critically evaluate our priorities and make conscious choices that reflect our true purposes.

I encourage everyone to reflect on my broader definition of success. By focusing on the impact of our actions and the energy we bring to our endeavors, we can create a legacy that goes beyond material wealth and contributes to a better world for future generations. We prioritize actions and choices that reflect our true values and purposes, leading to genuine success and fulfillment. As the CEO of PIROOZ Conscious Self-Care and Our Highest Mantra, I recognize that our ultimate goal should be to contribute positively to the world through our innate abilities and actions.

My spiritual journey has been a lifelong odyssey marked by moments of profound realization, personal challenges, and an unwavering quest for understanding. Growing up in a Bengali Hindu family, my father, a physicist and pantheist, influenced my early ventures into spirituality. However, it was my sister’s health struggles and eventual kidney transplant that significantly shaped my spiritual path.

From a young age, I practiced meditation, cultivating a sense of inner peace amidst external turmoil. In my twenties, my outlook shifted towards hedonism, as I sought to experience life’s varied aspects to integrate myself into reality and grapple with my own struggles. This phase was crucial in confronting and eventually overcoming my ‘savior complex,’ a trait common among teachers, coaches, and therapists who often wrestle with issues of self-worth and control.

The journey towards spiritual maturity involves acknowledging the complexity of emotions and experiences. Vulnerability and genuineness are not just virtues but necessities in relationships—both personal and professional. It’s important to understand that one’s duty is not to control another’s healing journey but to facilitate an environment where they can walk their path, learn from their falls, and progress at their own pace.

In this context, the balance of yin and yang energies becomes a vital component. These energies exist within everyone, transcending gender and identity. Understanding and harnessing these energies can guide us through personal and collective transformation. This concept is particularly resonant within the queer community, where fluidity of identity often aligns with the fluidity of spiritual energy.

Spirituality aids in addressing the savior complex by emphasizing self-exploration and questioning. It highlights the importance of healthy detachment, observing others with love and support without imposing one’s will. This journey leads to a deeper understanding of universal love, divine masculine and feminine energies, and the original meanings of spiritual concepts.

As I continue my exploration, I am drawn to the concept of happiness, believing that honesty is the first step towards attaining it. Balancing expectations with reality is crucial in this quest, as highlighted by the discussions with my host. Ultimately, spirituality offers a path to joy and liberation, not just for oneself but for all beings, as we collectively navigate the intricacies of existence.

In my years of spiritual exploration, I’ve come to understand that the journey of queerness and spirituality is intrinsically intertwined. At its core, the balancing act between yin and yang energies is a universal theme that resonates deeply within the queer community. This balance is not merely a theoretical construct but a lived experience that challenges cultural and religious projections about identity.

The concept of yin and yang, deeply rooted in various religions and spiritual practices, highlights the necessity of balance within the self. For queer individuals, this equilibrium often manifests through the fluidity of energy and roles within society and relationships. Despite the cultural hurdles, queer people possess an inherent ability to connect with varying energies and perspectives, transcending binary notions of existence.

My vision is to create a sanctuary for the queer community—an intimate space where these energies can be harmonized. A space that not only acknowledges the spectrum of identities but also fosters personal exploration in spirituality. This is not about assimilating into existing frameworks but about deconstructing and reconstructing our spiritual selves in ways that honor our unique experiences.

The harmful deployment of spirituality in social change movements often arises from a lack of understanding and genuine inclusivity. It’s crucial to avoid the pitfalls of identity politics within spiritual spaces. We must recognize the diverse expressions of spirituality and facilitate an environment where queer individuals can authentically engage with their spiritual selves.

Ultimately, the journey towards a balanced yin and yang in spirituality is a collective effort. It’s about observing each other with love, supporting one another without imposing control, and allowing everyone to be on their own unique path. By embracing this holistic approach, we can create a more inclusive and spiritually enriched community for all.

At this point, it's fair to say that most of us have heard of the term "self-sabotage." We've likely seen others engage in self-sabotaging behaviors, and we may have even done so ourselves at some point. Habits and patterns form for a number of reasons. They form through childhood experiences, genetics, culture, and environments. Maybe you were shown a certain example of love in childhood, and that example was wired into your nervous system. So, in relationships, you unconsciously seek those same patterns and deny anyone who offers something different. This doesn't make us wrong or bad; it's simply human.

Self-sabotaging allows us to predict what is going to happen, which gives us the illusion of control over our pain. As human beings, we are hardwired to keep ourselves safe and alive. If something in our patterning—our past experiences—has shown us that being vulnerable, using our voice, or exercising autonomy is a threat to our survival, then our brains and bodies will flag this as a threat.

Self-sabotage is a Survival Response

Changing self-sabotage requires understanding what it actually is: a powerful survival response. When we engage in self-sabotaging behaviors, our nervous system is trying to keep us safe.

Neuroscience tells us that experiences, traumas, and situations in our upbringing and past influence our interoceptive accuracy.

What is familiar is translated to be what is safe. Our brains cannot tell the difference between the two. Neuroscience tells us that the brain's fear center, the amygdala, is activated when we encounter something unfamiliar. This activates the body's stress response, which can lead to anxiety, fear, and even panic.

It’s not that you don’t want that relationship that is wildly loving and expansive because maybe love has always felt limiting or maybe tense or perhaps even unsafe.

It’s not that you don’t want that financial success, but maybe you’ve only ever known struggle and living paycheck-to-paycheck (or barely making ends meet)

It’s not that you don’t want that community of friends and bonds, it’s just that in the past friendship has only been something where you’ve only been able to show certain parts of yourself in order to be accepted.

So, when we try to change our habits or patterns, our brains may resist because they see it as a threat to our safety. This is why it can be so difficult to break bad habits or start new ones.

To see a change in your outer world, start by examining the narratives you tell yourself that define your concept of self. When you begin to shift those internal dialogues, you will shift the experience for yourself and actually feel capable of having what you desire.

The Control of Self-Sabotage

Self-sabotage is a complex behavior with numerous contributing factors. One way to understand it is as a coping mechanism for dealing with fear and powerlessness. When we feel powerless in a situation, we may self-sabotage in order to regain some sense of control. Self-sabotage is a way to take back control over people and situations where you feel you are losing power. The one who does the sabotaging is the one who is controlling the trajectory of the relationship.

Neuroscience research supports the idea that self-sabotage is often driven by fear. When we are afraid, our brains activate the amygdala, which is the fear center of the brain. The amygdala triggers a cascade of physiological responses,including increased heart rate, breathing, and muscle tension—the fight-or-flight response.

In some cases, the fight-or-flight response can be so intense that it leads you to make the exact opposite choice you want to make. This is because the amygdala bypasses the rational part of the brain and makes you act on impulse.

Self-sabotage can also be seen as a form of manipulation. When you self-sabotage, you are essentially forcing the outcome of a situation, even if it is not the outcome you want. This can be a way of protecting ourselves from further hurt or disappointment.

However, self-sabotage is ultimately counterproductive. It reinforces the limiting beliefs that you have about yourself and the world around you. It also prevents you from achieving your goals and living a fulfilling life.

Staying in Alignment

From a spiritual perspective, self-sabotage can be seen as a sign that we are out of alignment with our true selves. When we are not living in alignment with our true selves, we experience a sense of inner conflict. This conflict can manifest in a variety of ways, including self-sabotage.

To overcome self-sabotage, we need to first identify the underlying beliefs that are driving it. Once we have identified these beliefs, we can begin to challenge them and replace them with more positive and empowering beliefs.

We also need to learn to trust ourselves and our ability to handle whatever life throws our way. When we trust ourselves, we no longer need to self-sabotage in order to protect ourselves.

Releasing self-sabotaging reactions and behaviors takes intense alchemy and inner work. However, it is incredibly important to do so in order to feel peace and happiness, and experience love, and real and healthy attachment. It is something each human must confront at some point in their life.

Choosing Is Not Selfish

When we choose ourselves it’s not Selfish. Selfishness is about putting your own needs ahead of others without any regard for their needs or feelings. Selflessness asks that you sacrifice your own needs and well-being for the sake of others, even when it is not necessary or healthy. Often and across cultures and belief systems, selflessness is touted as altruistic, holy, and something to strive towards.

It is not selfish to choose yourself; it is an act of self-honor. Self-honor is about taking care of your own needs and well-being so that you can show up for yourself and others in your fullness, not at your own expense. You should never give from your own cup. Most of us would never ask our closest loved ones to give from their own cup what is theirs to fill their needs, yet we as humans consistently seem to deny ourselves that same honor. When you honor yourself and give from your overflow, that is how you can best show up for yourself and those around you. That is how you embody your sovereignty. It’s okay to say no to people, places, or situations if what is being asked is to give from a place of self-betrayal.

You Are Always Choosing

Along this Phoenix path of death and rebirth, you will continuously be presented with choices. You are always choosing, whether you decide to be conscious of it is another matter. However, your thoughts precede your actions and your actions come from a decision being made. There is power in choice because in that choice you are placing your intent there.

The illusion of safety from not making a choice is simply that, an illusion. There is perceived safety in having lots of options and allowing yourself to stay in the place of indecision. The truth of the matter is though, when you are not consciously choosing, others are automatically choosing for you. Whether it’s a partner, a workplace, a situation, an ideology, a culture, or a systemic belief, the choice is still happening; the choice is being made for you. Whether we decide to be active co-creators in the outcome of our lives or not, life continues to progress.

When we begin to make conscious choices, on a micro or macro level, we are choosing to honor our needs and boundaries. We are honoring our capacity, giving from a place of overflow and not at a detriment to ourselves. Choosing yourself is a radical act of love and in that, there is immense power to begin to direct and shape our lives as active creators of our future.

Choosing Yourself is Sovereignty

When we choose ourselves, we engage in a powerful act of alchemy. We are consciously and energetically making a statement to ourselves of our own inherent worthiness, our Sovereignty. We engage in an act of healing when we make choices that are aligned with our values.

We are transforming our lives from the inside out. We are creating a new reality for ourselves, one that is based on our values and desires. We are creating a life that both honors us and from that honor, we, in turn, honor others. We begin to enter into a world whose vibrational frequency is one of reciprocity and mutual respect. The more we embody unconditional Love and Sovereignty within ourselves, the more we co-create a harmonious world, by the mere energetic effect our lives have.

The Beauty of Choice

Choosing yourself doesn’t happen in one singular moment, but rather in the everyday choices that you are presented with. That is the beauty of choice as well. You will feel drawn to what resonates with you, in your own unique language. Yes, there are healthy tools that are designed to help you along your path and they absolutely do. However, it matters less what those tools are so much as you come to the point of clarity on what it is you want for yourself. If you don’t have clarity on your values and what it is you inherently desire to see in your life then that is an invitation to continue deepening your understanding of yourself.

Know Your Values

Knowing what your values are is foundational. Continuing to make choices as you figure it out is also foundational. Experience is your teacher. You are invited into a state of being where there is unconditional love as you learn to embody your authentic self. Most of us have spent our entire lives disconnected from our innermost core selves. The core self that exists outside of labels and structures. The you that was always there before the world told you that you had to be someone else in order to be seen and loved. Your power lies in the work of going inward, confronting your patterns and wounds, and allowing all parts of you to be held in honor and wholeness.

Take a moment to reflect on your week.

Did you make choices that honored your authentic self?

Did you make choices that were based on obligation or fear? Wounding?

Is this a pattern that keeps showing up?

When you take the time to observe and reflect, you allow a further deepening of understanding and trust within yourself. It is an invitation to allow radical compassion towards ourselves through this process. We learn by doing. Each day presents you with an opportunity to choose.

There is liberation in choosing. There is honor in choosing you. It is a radical act of love.

Have you chosen yourself today?

Mantra: I choose to make conscious choices that honor myself.

Sovereignty, a foundational concept symbolizing the utmost authority and the inherent interconnectedness of things, grants governing power to an entity, whether it's a nation, a state, or an individual.

This takes an even deeper meaning when you approach it from a personal perspective. Sovereignty fosters a sense of responsibility, encouraging the wise and judicious exercise of that authority for the betterment of all, and when approached this way, whether on a national or personal level, invites a harmonious coexistence where individuality thrives within the framework of collective interdependence.

Sovereignty is not simply about our own individual power and liberation. It is also about our interconnectedness with others and with the planet as a whole. When we claim our Sovereignty, we are also empowering others to do the same. And when we create a world where everyone is sovereign, we create a world that is more just, equitable, and sustainable.

Sovereignty is the core of self-determination, empowering you as you make choices aligned with your core needs and desires. It refers to the state of being self-governing, autonomous, and empowered in your own life. It encompasses the freedom to make conscious choices, embrace personal values and beliefs, and take responsibility for your growth and well-being. Sovereignty involves living in alignment with yourself, accessing inner wisdom, and cultivating a sense of inner authority.

Sovereignty is also tied with the concept of self-concept and both are fundamental components in psychology. Self-concept is the overall image we have of ourselves. It includes our thoughts, feelings, and beliefs about our physical appearance, personality, abilities, and roles in life. Our self-concept is shaped by our experiences, relationships, and culture. It is also rooted in the idea that we are all active creators of our own reality. Our thoughts, feelings, and beliefs about ourselves influence our behavior, which in turn influences our experiences. This creates a feedback loop that can either reinforce our existing self-concept or lead to change.

The thing is, self-concept is not fixed. As you continue to make choices in integrity with your authentic values and beliefs, your self-concept shifts. As your self-concept shifts, so does your outer world.

Sovereignty is inherent at the quantum level as well. One of the key principles of quantum physics is the principle of superposition. Superposition means that a quantum particle can be in multiple states at the same time. Another key principle of quantum physics is the principle of entanglement. Entanglement means that two quantum particles can be linked together in such a way that they share the same fate, even if they are separated by a large distance. They suggest that we are not fixed and static beings at all. Rather, we are fluid and dynamic beings who are constantly changing and evolving.

How you see yourself, how you interact with others, and how you set and achieve your goals are all determined by the inherent truth you believe about yourself.

Sovereignty is the power to choose your own reality. It's the ability to live your life according to your own values and beliefs, without interference from others. It's about making choices that are aligned with who you are and what you want. It's the permission you give yourself to live in complete authenticity.

Sovereignty and Freedom

It’s important to understand that Sovereignty, though it intersects with freedom, is still a fundamentally different concept. This is especially true when you are talking about human beings. Freedom can mean a lot of the same things as Sovereignty yet there are a few key differences that shift the narrative when viewed through the lens of Sovereignty.

Sovereignty refers to the supreme authority and independence vested in a governing entity, be it a nation, state, or individual. Freedom is a broader term that refers to the absence of constraints or the right to act according to one's own will within the framework of laws or societal norms. Unlike Sovereignty, freedom doesn't necessarily imply the power or authority to govern. While both terms are powerful and essential components of the human experience, with Sovereignty the focus is on your authority to make decisions free from external control. With freedom, the focus is on the absence of constraints in making decisions aligned with your will.

Sovereignty extends beyond freedom. It permeates every aspect of your life. It is a deep and reverent honoring of yourself. Your energy, your time, your body, your autonomy, your security. It is a no to anything that asks you to betray yourself and a yes to honoring your inherent right to live a life fully expressed and authentically embodied. It is a state of being where there is unconditional love for yourself in such a way that that same love pours out through your interactions, in your relationships. Your outer world begins to reflect your inner world as you continue to step even deeper into who you always were. Remembering. Waiting.

Sovereignty is your Birthright

Sovereignty is your birthright. Sovereignty is you as the commander of your own life, living according to your own values and beliefs. It is you being rooted in yourself. It's the power to create the life you want, on your own terms. It's the freedom to be authentic, without fear of judgment. It's the ability to say no to the things that don't serve you and yes to the things that do.

What if instead of fighting against yourself to fit into a mold that was never meant for you to fit into, you began to cultivate a deep and intimate relationship with yourself and from that knowing, dictate what your life will be?

Sometimes it means setting new boundaries and protecting your energy. Sometimes it means saying no to people and things that only accept you as long as you are operating from a state of self-betrayal. It means speaking your truth and living your life in full authenticity.

Begin to sit with yourself. What are your values? What are your beliefs? What do you want out of life? The more you know about yourself, the more empowered you will be to make choices that are aligned with your true self.

You will face challenges and obstacles in life, it is part of the human experience each of us go through. Allow yourself the respect and space to flex new muscles as you walk your path. You learn through experience. Just because it feels like you are going in a circle doesn’t mean you aren’t also moving upwards. As shifts happen, give yourself infinite amounts of love and compassion.

Sovereignty is at its core essence, unconditional love. It’s a remembrance of your inherent worthiness that exists within you and is not something that can be taken from you. It is yours. It is a deeply devoted radical unconditional love within yourself so powerful it radiates from you and permeates every aspect of your life and those around you.

You are worthy of a life that is defined by your core self, fully embodied, and unconditionally loved. You are worthy of a life that is not your wounding, patterns, and traumas. A life unapologetically living its fullest expansion, your highest self, your Phoenix.

Self-sabotage is complex and multi-faceted. It’s also something everyone has done, to various degrees, in their work, relationships, and love, whether consciously or unconsciously. So many humans self-sabotage and most aren’t even aware they are doing it. There’s always a compelling and, on the surface level, often logical reason people have for their self-sabotaging behaviors. At one point or another, we can relate to the various situations that trigger humans to self-sabotage. Maybe you purposefully pull or run away from a relationship that you feel excited about. Or, perhaps after leaving a toxic relationship, you are finding yourself anxiously overthinking and reacting out of that wounding in your next one. Maybe you cheat to control the level of commitment or emotion you are giving to your partner. Maybe you purposefully avoid taking that learning course or career opportunity you know you want because you don’t want to be disappointed and the possibility of failure feels daunting.

Think about how self-sabotage has been present in your life. What situations have you been in where you’ve felt you might have engaged in self-sabotaging behaviors? What were you trying to protect yourself from? What outcome were you trying to avoid? What did you potentially miss out on by doing so?

Liberation from Shame

Understanding that identifying with the idea of sabotaging yourself can produce shame is key. What you are actually doing is following the autonomic impulse to stay within what is familiar. New is unknown. It’s something that has never been done before. A new pattern is being built oftentimes with no prior framework. It can be both liberating and terrifying to ask ourselves what it might look like for us to live in complete expansiveness.

Shame is a body response driven by the frozen state of the nervous system when its survival response is activated. This part of your nervous system shuts down and immobilizes your energy. This shows up as a disconnection from yourself and also your environment and presents itself in both the mind and the body. This system shutdown is an attempt to bring yourself back into a state of regulation, or harmony. It is a protective response when you are feeling emotional overload and are extended past your current capacity.

If that feeling of shame occurs often enough without being harmonized by connection and belonging, it becomes an ingrained pattern, and a new neural pathway is formed with the framework of shame activating it.

Your behavior, the one that produced the intense feelings of shame, actually makes sense when you observe it through the layer of your nervous system. Defensiveness may present as a very real way of coping when shame is being experienced and you may argue, blame, or criticize others to not feel it. You may leave vulnerable situations or avoid what you’re afraid of failing at. You may overgive and appease others in a situation that triggers this survival response or experience feelings of powerlessness that lead to a nervous system shutdown.

The problem isn’t shame. It’s allowing your nervous system to notice and begin to show radical amounts of compassion where shame resides, easing yourself out of that freeze state. When you can begin to cultivate a relationship with your shame that is based on love, when can more easily identify when you are engaging in self-sabotaging behaviors and begin to shift the internal narrative that manifests in the way you choose to respond.

As you examine those narratives and patterns, approach yourself with gentleness. This can be a deeply uncomfortable process, especially if you aren’t used to sitting and reflecting. If you want to break the cycle and start something new, you first have to notice the patterns that you unconsciously seek. Bring them from your unconscious into your consciousness. Be gentle with yourself because this process comes up as we cycle through life in different ways at various times. The beauty and radical unconditional love that result from this re-patterning are wildly expansive. You are cultivating a relationship with yourself and in discovering that you possess the capability to determine what your life will ultimately be. In understanding our patterns and narratives that prevent us from experiencing liberation.

Work with Your Body

As much as the process of reframing self-sabotage occurs in the mind, it also happens in the body. Your survival response is just as much a state that occurs in your body as well as your mind. Work with your body and not against it. You are never going to get to where you want by bullying yourself into doing it. It just doesn’t work that way. Your body has done a tremendous job of getting you to exactly where you are today. Part of not avoiding discomfort means learning to cultivate a relationship with your body that is centered around safety and unconditional love so that we don’t continually go back and forth away from our bodies in order to find safety.

When you want to change your patterns, you need to first self-regulate your nervous system. This means finding ways to calm down and feel safe so that you can make clear choices. When you are feeling overwhelmed, it can be helpful to engage in activities that help to calm down your nervous system. These activities include breathing exercises such as breathwork, progressive muscle relaxation and body scanning, and lastly meditation. You can also co-regulate with nature and the people around us, by spending time in nature, connecting with others, and receiving support. You can work with your body to rewire the way you respond to new people, relationships, and situations.

Part of observing without shame is to pay attention to your body's signals. When you are feeling threatened or unsafe, your body will give you signals. These signals may include muscle tension, sweating, or a racing heart. Pay attention to these signals and learn to identify what they mean.

What would it look like to explore the idea that your body is safe to reside in?

Notice the Patterns

Once we have regulated our nervous system, we can then acknowledge what we desire. This means being honest with ourselves about what we want, and not letting our old patterns get in the way. If we want a wildly expansive, loving relationship, we need to remember that we want it, and then notice the old patterns that are holding us back. We can then choose a new way to take action, such as setting boundaries, communicating our needs, and being vulnerable.

The same is true for wanting a community that is reciprocal and enriching. We need to remember that we want it, notice the old patterns, and then choose a new way to take action. This might mean putting ourselves out there, being open to meeting new people, and being willing to take risks.

We can think of this process as a cycle of Awareness → Re-Alignment → Action. We become aware of our old patterns, we re-align ourselves with our desires, and then we take action. We can repeat this cycle over and over again until we create the life we are commanding for ourselves.

Cultivate Compassion

It is important to cultivate compassion for what was. This means forgiving ourselves for the mistakes we have made and letting go of the old patterns that no longer serve us. We can also take action on what can be. This means believing in ourselves and our ability to create the life we want.

By doing these things, we can teach ourselves, moment by moment, that we deserve it all. As we step deeper into our authenticity, we further recognize our power. The more we recognize our power, the more our reality begins to shift around us.

What would your reality look like if you allowed yourself to know that there was nothing holding you back?

Everything in life starts with a choice. Our earliest choices are subconscious and reflexive, but they are essential for our survival and well-being. We choose to turn our heads towards light, to reach for comfort or nourishment, and to cry out when we are uncomfortable. As we get older, our choices become more conscious and deliberate. We are shaped by our experiences, values, and beliefs, as well as the people around us. We choose what we want to eat, what we want to wear, who we want to play with, and how we want to live our lives.

Choice is a fundamental property of human consciousness. Consciousness is the ability to be aware of one's own existence and to make choices about one's future. Choice is the essence of humanity; we are human because we can choose, and our choices allow us to shape our own futures. Without choice, we would be nothing more than creatures of habit, responding to our environment in predetermined ways. Our choices matter. They define who we are and what we want to achieve in life. They form the framework of our reality.

When we choose ourselves, we are engaging in a powerful act of alchemy. We are transforming our lives from the inside out. We are creating a new reality for ourselves, one that is based on our values and desires.

Neuroplasticity and the Power of Choice

The principle of our choices shaping our brains is grounded in psychology, specifically in the field of neuroplasticity. Neuroplasticity is the ability of the brain to change and adapt in response to experience. It is now well-established that our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors can all have a significant impact on the structure and function of our brains.

One of the key ways our choices shape our brains is through the release of dopamine. Dopamine is a neurotransmitter associated with pleasure, motivation, and learning. When we make choices that are aligned with our values and desires, our brains release dopamine, which reinforces those choices and makes us more likely to repeat them in the future.

Another way our choices shape our brains is through the formation of new neural pathways. When we learn something new or experience something new, our brains form new neural pathways. These new neural pathways make it easier for us to repeat those experiences in the future. It suggests that we can change our brains and behavior by making conscious choices about how we live our lives.

Choice is Everywhere

One of the key principles of quantum physics is the interconnectedness of the universe. Quantum physics teaches us that everything is made up of energy and that all energy is interconnected. This means that our thoughts and emotions, which are also forms of energy, are interconnected with the energy field of the universe. Another key principle of quantum physics is the observer effect. The observer effect states that the act of observation affects the outcome of an experiment. This is because the observer is interacting with the energy field of the experiment, and this interaction can alter the outcome.

So, how does this relate to the belief that our thoughts and actions have a real impact on the world around us?

Well, if we think of ourselves as observers of the universe, then our thoughts and emotions are essentially observations. And if our observations can affect the outcome of experiments, then it stands to reason that our thoughts and emotions can also affect the outcome of our own lives and the lives of others.

The universe is a mirror of our minds. What we think and feel, we create. Our thoughts and actions have a real impact on the world around us and on ourselves. Our choices are powerful.

Choosing is Liberation

When we choose ourselves, we are creating a new reality for ourselves. We are no longer living according to the expectations of others. We are living our lives on our own terms. We are fully Sovereign. Consciously choosing is an active breathing movable framework. Choice is what shapes our reality.

Freedom is not about having the most options possible, but about making choices. This is a subtle but important distinction. While having lots of options may seem like a good thing, it can actually be paralyzing. When we have too many choices, we can get overwhelmed and start to doubt ourselves. This can lead to analysis paralysis, where we get stuck in the "in-between" and never make a decision at all.

Staying in the in-between is not liberation. It is a form of self-imposed imprisonment. When we don't make choices, we are giving up our power and control over our lives. We are allowing other people and circumstances to dictate our destiny. Choice is the framework that allows us to live our lives according to our own values and desires, regardless of what others think or expect of us.

When we make a choice, we are not just choosing between different options. We are also choosing who we want to be and how we want to live our lives. We are choosing our own destiny.

The world is full of duality. We are surrounded by it. We see it displayed across our screens, in our communities, and across the globe. There is light and dark, good and evil, love and hate, masculine and feminine, science and spirituality. We so often see these things as opposites, when in fact, they are two aspects of the same reality. They are interdependent on one another.

In the Upanishads, it is said that "the universe is both one and many, both light and dark.” In the Tao Te Ching, it is said that "the way of the Tao is like the way of the river. It flows both dark and light, yin and yang." The dark and the light are both necessary for the river to flow. In the Kabbalah, it is said that "God is both light and dark, good and evil."

The dark is not something to be feared or avoided, but rather it is a necessary part of the journey of growth and transformation.

When we deny our dark, we are denying the part of ourselves that needs to be healed and transformed. We are also denying ourselves the opportunity to access our deepest wisdom and the nucleus of our power.

The dark is often associated with fear, pain, and difficulty. But it is also the place where we can find our deepest creativity, intuition, and strength. When we choose to go within, into our own dark, we are opening ourselves up to the possibility of change. We are allowing ourselves to see things that we have been avoiding. Our wounding, our patterns, the cycles we keep seeing play out in our lives, our self-limiting beliefs, the frameworks we’ve built around us - a combination of our deepest fears and our perception of who we believe we are supposed to be as individuals in this world. When we allow ourselves to understand our dark is there to walk us through our deepest transformations, we are giving ourselves the chance to heal and shift our reality in a way that embodies the wholeness that is you.

Facing Our Darkness

Facing our darkness is not known to be easy. It can be painful and uncomfortable. But it is ultimately the path to understanding and acceptance. It is a call to come home. When we do experience dense emotions, observe them without Judgement. This means paying attention to the physical, behavioral, and cognitive signs of our emotions. It also means allowing ourselves to feel our emotions without trying to suppress or deny them. Simply put: pay attention to it.

Dense emotions are strong, often overwhelming emotions that can feel difficult to manage. They can be caused by a variety of factors, such as trauma, stress, or unresolved issues. Dense emotions can manifest in a variety of ways, including physical symptoms (such as headaches, stomachaches, or muscle tension), behavioral changes (such as withdrawal, aggression, or substance abuse), and cognitive distortions (such as negative thinking or catastrophizing), to name a few.

When we feel dense emotions surfacing, it is an invitation to pay attention. To sit with our fear, anger, or sadness, and see what they are trying to tell us. What are we resisting? What are we afraid of? What do we need to release? Where do we need to show ourselves more compassion? What areas need love instead of shame? Understanding instead of Judgement?

The darkness is not something to be feared. It is simply a part of life. Whatever the darkness or dense emotions are, is where we are meant to be. It is where we can grow and learn and continue to operate from a place of unconditional love and sovereignty. In this act alone we experience wholeness - the dark and light as one.

Experiencing Trust

When we understand that our darkness and dense emotions are to be observed and honored as teachers, we can then experience trust. Trust is the foundation for light to enter our lives. Without trust, we cannot open ourselves up to the possibility of change or growth. Trust cultivates a sense of safety within ourselves. One that isn’t easily swayed by the external world. When we trust ourselves, we are able to sit with our darkness without fear or Judgement. We can allow ourselves to feel our emotions fully, without trying to suppress or deny them. In doing so, we can begin to understand the messages that our darkness is trying to convey.

Alchemy

Darkness is often seen as something to be feared, but it is actually a necessary part of the journey to wholeness. It is through darkness that we are able to learn and grow. It is through darkness that we are able to find the light. This is a deeply transformative process; alchemy in its purest form.

Alchemy is the process of transforming something into something else. In the context of our emotions, alchemy is the process of transforming darkness into light. When we alchemize our darkness, we are able to use it as a source of power and expansiveness.

This process of alchemization allows us to connect with ourselves intimately. When we can connect with ourselves intimately, we can connect with others. When we can connect with others, we can show up authentically with mutual honor and respect. When we can cultivate authentic connections with others, we can transform our communities and the world around us.

When we trust ourselves and alchemize our darkness, we open ourselves up to the possibility of something greater. We become whole. We become light.

Darkness is a powerful teacher.

When we sit with it, we can begin to see it for what it is: a part of us, not something to be feared or rejected. We start to understand that darkness and light are not opposites, but two parts of the whole. They can work together in harmony. We can learn from darkness, grow from it, and ultimately use it to create a more beautiful world. It is the key to our transformation.

In today's digital age, building your personal brand is more important than ever. With the rise of social media and the internet, it's easier than ever to showcase your skills, expertise, and personality to a wider audience. Outside of showcasing your skills and expertise, building a strong personal brand has become increasingly important. Your personal brand is your reputation, your unique value proposition, and your professional identity. It's how you present yourself to the world and how others perceive you. A strong personal brand will help you stand out in a crowded marketplace, establish credibility and trust with clients and colleagues, and create new opportunities for career advancement.

Research has shown that authenticity is a key driver of trust and loyalty. According to a survey by the consulting firm Deloitte, 82% of respondents said that they are more likely to trust a company whose leadership team is transparent and authentic. This same principle applies to personal brands as well. When you are authentic in your personal brand, you build trust with your audience, which can lead to more opportunities, connections, and career success.

Another study by LinkedIn found that 70% of professionals believe that a strong professional brand is important for career success, while 50% said that they have missed out on a job opportunity because they did not have a strong personal brand. People are no longer content with just seeing the polished, professional side of a person. They want to see the person behind the brand – the real, authentic, and relatable human being.

So how can you build a personal brand that is both authentic and effective? It starts by closing the gap between your work and personal life. People want to see the whole person, not just the professional side. By showcasing your personality, interests, and hobbies, you can create a more authentic and relatable personal brand. This means being true to yourself and your values, and showcasing your unique personality and perspective. It's not about trying to be someone you're not, or putting on a façade to impress others. Instead, it's about showing the real you, flaws and all.

Successful leaders who have built strong personal brands by showcasing their personality include Richard Branson, the founder of Virgin Group, and Gary Vaynerchuk, the CEO of VaynerMedia. Both of these leaders have built their personal brands by sharing their passions and interests with the world, and by being authentic and transparent about their successes and failures.

As someone who started building their personal brand in the past 2 years, I can attest to the power of authenticity. I believe that being true to yourself is the key to building a brand that truly resonates with your audience. When I share my personal experiences, interests, and passions on social media and in my work, I find that people are more engaged because it's real, relatable and most of all, it's honest. I regularly post about topics such as mindfulness, social impact, and personal growth on my various social media channels, which has helped me to connect with like-minded individuals and establish myself as a thought leader in my field.

Of course, being authentic can be challenging, especially in a world where there is pressure to conform and present a perfect image. However, the benefits of authenticity far outweigh the risks. When you are true to yourself, you attract people who appreciate you for who you are, and you build a brand that is truly unique and memorable.

It's time to close the gap between work and personal life, and show the world the real you. If you're looking to take your personal brand to the next level and need some guidance, I offer private coaching services that can help you achieve your goals. My coaching focuses on building a strong personal brand that is authentic and effective, while also helping you develop the skills and knowledge you need to succeed in your career.

Additionally, I recently launched a new brand called Our Highest Mantra, which is focused on personal growth, community, and social impact. Through this brand, I share insights, tips, and resources to help individuals build a more fulfilling and purpose-driven life. I look forward to connecting with you and helping you achieve your personal and professional goals.

Whether you're a seasoned professional or just starting out, the world of workplace politics can be a confusing place. As someone who has navigated the complex world of workplace politics, I'm here to spill the tea on how to overcome the game while maintaining your sense of dignity.

Understand the Game

The first step to mastering workplace politics is to understand what you're dealing with. Workplace politics is all about the power dynamics, relationships, and strategies that influence decision-making and outcomes in the workplace. By knowing the types of politics at play, you'll be better equipped to recognize them in action.

According to a survey by the Society for Human Resource Management, 84% of employees say that workplace politics exist in their organization. However, only 12% of employees say that they are effective at navigating workplace politics.

Build Positive Relationships

Networking is key to building positive relationships in the workplace. Attend company events and conferences, and don't be afraid to introduce yourself to new people. It's also important to establish trust and credibility with your colleagues by being honest and authentic.

Employees who have a best friend at work are seven times more likely to be engaged in their job. Building positive relationships in the workplace not only helps you navigate workplace politics, but it also makes work more enjoyable.

Communicate Effectively

Effective communication is crucial for navigating workplace politics like a boss. Speak up and share your ideas, but also listen carefully to others. Understanding communication styles and adapting your own communication style accordingly is also important for successful interactions with colleagues.

A study by The Economist Intelligence Unit found that poor communication is a major barrier to collaboration in the workplace. Effective communication is key to successful teamwork and workplace relationships.

Manage Conflict

Conflict is bound to arise in any workplace, but knowing how to manage it effectively is key. Identify conflicts early on and resolve them before they escalate. Don't be afraid to confront difficult colleagues, but always stay calm and professional.

Employees spend an average of 2.8 hours per week dealing with conflict in the workplace. Effective conflict management can save time and improve workplace relationships.

Manage Up

Building a positive relationship with your boss is crucial for career success. Learn your boss's communication style and adapt your own communication style accordingly. Understanding the power dynamics between you and your boss is also important for navigating workplace politics. According to a study by Harvard Business Review, employees who have a good relationship with their boss are more engaged and productive at work.

Maintain Professionalism

Gossip and negativity have no place in the workplace, honey. Keep things positive and professional by avoiding negative talk and managing your emotions. You're a boss, so act like one.

A survey by Accountemps found that 60% of employees have witnessed their colleagues engage in gossip at work, and 31% of employees say that gossip has decreased their productivity.

Stay Focused

Avoid burnout by taking care of yourself and setting boundaries. Set goals for yourself and stay focused on them, planning and executing your strategy for success.

Research by Harvard Business Review shows that employees who take time for self-care and relaxation are more productive and engaged at work.

In conclusion, mastering workplace politics is not for the faint of heart, but with the right mindset and strategies, anyone can do it. By understanding the game, building positive relationships, communicating effectively, managing conflict, managing up, maintaining professionalism, and staying focused, you'll be well on your way to

Navigating workplace politics can be tough, but I'm here to help. I offer private personal and professional coaching services to help you achieve your career goals. In addition, my brand, Our Highest Mantra, is dedicated to empowering individuals to reach their full potential. Our Highest Mantra provides coaching, workshops, and events to help you succeed. If you're ready to take your career to the next level, join me and Our Highest Mantra today.

It's almost 2025 and the way we approach progress—both personal and collective—requires a significant shift. While each of us may tread our own path in terms of internal development, humanity's advancement is a shared desire. At the core of this collective effort are two fundamental elements: love and vision. Without these, there is no hope for meaningful progress. However, there is a widespread misconception that a detailed plan is necessary before starting any new venture. This belief is not only misguided but also limiting. Plans, while important, are often rigid and can become obstacles rather than facilitators of progress. What truly drives progress is vision—a clear, compelling picture of the future that inspires and guides action.

The Power of Vision

Vision is the foundation of any significant achievement. It is the mental image of what we aspire to create, the guiding star that leads us through uncertainty. Vision provides direction and purpose, fueling our motivation and resilience. When we have a vision, we have a destination, and life helps us navigate the path toward it. This is not to say that plans are unnecessary. On the contrary, they are essential tools that help us organize our efforts and resources. However, plans should be flexible and adaptable, evolving in response to changing circumstances and new information. A rigid plan can stifle creativity and limit our ability to respond to unforeseen challenges. A dynamic plan, on the other hand, can evolve alongside our vision, allowing us to stay focused on our goals while adapting our strategies as needed.

The Fallacy of Planning

The idea that we need a comprehensive plan before starting anything is a significant barrier to progress. It creates a paralysis by analysis, where the fear of not having all the answers prevents us from taking the first step. This mindset is rooted in a desire for control and certainty, which are often illusions. In reality, the path to achieving our vision is rarely linear and predictable. It is a process of discovery, requiring us to be open to new possibilities and ready to adjust our course as we go.

One of the most powerful realizations is that if you have a vision, the plan will come. Life has a way of providing the opportunities and resources needed to achieve our goals when we are committed to our vision. This requires a shift from a focus on planning to a focus on vision and action. By holding our vision firmly and taking the first step, we set in motion a process that allows the plan to unfold organically.

Helping Others See

As leaders, one of our most important roles is to help others see the power of vision. When we inspire our teams with a compelling vision, we open up their creativity and drive.

This is particularly important in the context of organizational development. If your goal is to increase loyalty and devotion among your team, focus less on the "how" and more on the "what." Emphasize the mission, the purpose behind the work, rather than the specific steps. Goals are temporary, but missions are enduring. When people are aligned with a mission, they are more likely to stay committed and resilient, even in the face of challenges. A shared vision fosters a sense of collective purpose and unity, creating a culture where everyone is motivated to contribute to a greater good.

Creating a Culture of Vision

To create a culture where vision is paramount, we must first embody this mindset ourselves. As leaders, we must be advocates and exemplars of the vision-driven approach. This means being passionate and vocal about our vision and demonstrating through our actions how it guides our decisions and strategies. It also means being open to feedback and willing to adjust our plans as needed, showing that flexibility and adaptability are strengths, not weaknesses. Creating such a culture also involves fostering an environment where everyone feels empowered to contribute to the vision. This requires clear communication, trust, and a willingness to delegate authority. When people feel that their ideas and efforts are valued, they are more likely to take ownership of the vision and work collaboratively to achieve it.

The Collective Path

Ultimately, the path to human progress is a collective one. While we may each have our own visions, it is through collaboration and shared purpose that we can achieve the greatest impact. This requires a shift from a mindset of individual achievement to one of collective advancement. By aligning our personal visions with broader societal goals, we can create a more cohesive and resilient society. Holding our vision firmly and being open to how things unfold, we can navigate the complexities of the modern world and create a future that reflects our highest aspirations. Let us walk together on this path, guided by love and vision, and build a better world for all.

Each customer's journey with your e-commerce brand is unique and personalized. This actually shows that you're doing something right - being present wherever your customers might be. Of course, this involves carefully curating every touchpoint. Let's explore what this means. When your brand is accessible to customers, their experiences can vary widely. Some might stumble upon you through an Instagram hashtag, others through a friend's suggestion, or some might have received your product as a gift. As a result, it's super important for you to thoughtfully manage each touchpoint in these customer interactions. This is known as a full-circle approach to digital marketing.

A full-circle digital marketing approach is all about considering, strategizing, planning, and implementing a cohesive brand philosophy and voice across all customer-facing touchpoints, like social media, Google ads, email marketing, website design, and customer support. By doing this, you ensure that no matter where someone discovers your brand, they'll enjoy a consistent, dependable, and mutually rewarding relationship with you.

Picture McDonald's, where a Big Mac tastes the same whether you're in your hometown or a state away. This consistency is achieved through a well-crafted recipe, ingredient control, and staff training. Similarly, your brand marketing should maintain consistency in all channels, taking into account the cultural context.

Now, let's break down the full-circle approach into its four core components, in a friendlier tone: consideration, strategy, planning, and implementation.

Consideration

During this stage, you'll figure out the core messages and personality behind your brand. This involves identifying the brand's story, its objectives, and its target audience. You'll also think about which social media platforms to be present on and whether or not to claim handles on platforms you won't be active on.

Strategy

Each touchpoint requires its own strategy, based on your brand's voice and philosophy. This includes organic social posts, customer support interactions, email flows, and even flexibility in policies like return windows. Keep in mind that each medium shapes the message you send.

Planning

No matter your brand's size, effective communication and planning are essential to success. Misaligned teams and poor communication can lead to inconsistencies and lost sales. By creating a plan for your processes and clear lines of communication, you can avoid these hiccups.

Implementation (and Ongoing Maintenance)

A full-circle approach to digital marketing ensures a seamless customer experience but requires consistent maintenance. Whether it's sales, product launches, or everyday operations, changes should be considered, strategized, planned, and implemented across all touchpoints. Loads of brands struggle with maintaining this approach, often due to disconnected agencies or a lack of thoughtful planning. However, with the right consideration, strategy, planning, and implementation, your brand can become the go-to, trusted choice for customers who will keep coming back for more.

In conclusion, a full-circle approach to digital marketing is essential for creating a consistent, trustworthy, and rewarding experience for your customers. But why stop there?

We've all been there - a lively brainstorming session with colleagues, bouncing ideas off each other, and feeling that creative energy flow. Surprisingly, research indicates that group brainstorming might actually be stifling our creativity instead of boosting it. In this article, we'll delve into why brainstorming in a group may not be the optimal approach and how remote and virtual work can impact the creative process.

The Group Brainstorming Dilemma

Way back in the 1950s, a study by psychologist Irving Janis at Yale University discovered that group brainstorming generated fewer and less creative ideas than individuals brainstorming independently. More recent studies support these findings, pointing to factors like social loafing, evaluation apprehension, and production blocking as barriers to creativity in group settings.

Noise and Iteration: Group Creativity Roadblocks

Group brainstorming can create a "noisy" atmosphere, where the focus strays from generating innovative ideas to merely iterating on existing solutions. This can lead to "anchoring," where group members become fixated on the initial ideas presented, struggling to think outside the box.

Additionally, in a group setting, individuals may conform to others' opinions, suppressing their own unique insights or radical ideas to align with the group consensus. This conformity can limit idea diversity and hinder the creative process.

The Power of Solitude in Problem Solving

Research on insights and problem-solving suggests that individuals working alone can be more successful in generating creative ideas. Psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi found that creative individuals often experienced their most profound insights when working in solitude.

The Remote Work and Virtual Creativity Connection

With the rise of remote work and virtual collaboration tools, we have new ways to approach creativity and brainstorming. Research has shown that virtual brainstorming can be more effective than in-person sessions, as it allows individuals to contribute ideas at their own pace without the distractions and pressures of a group setting. Additionally, virtual platforms can help level the playing field, reducing the influence of dominant personalities and allowing quieter team members to have their voices heard.

While group brainstorming can have its advantages, it's essential to recognize its potential drawbacks and explore alternative methods for fostering creativity. Encouraging individual brainstorming, leveraging virtual collaboration tools, and creating an environment that nurtures diverse ideas can help teams unlock their full creative potential.

Embracing personal and professional growth has become an essential aspect of my life. Like many others, I have faced setbacks that have tested my resilience and determination. It was during these times that I discovered the power of transformation and self-discovery – the Phoenix Journey. This journey represents the process of reinvention, resilience, and embracing one's true self, allowing us to rise above adversity and create meaningful lives. As I share the five key elements of the Phoenix Journey, my hope is that you too can harness its power to navigate your personal and professional life with grace and determination.

Embrace Change as Opportunity

Recognize change as a catalyst for growth and innovation. Adopt a proactive mindset to navigate uncertainty, and leverage it to create new possibilities in your personal and professional life. This adaptability will enable you to excel in any environment.

Acknowledge and Address Past Obstacles

To unlock your full potential, confront the challenges and traumas that may impede your progress. Invest in personal development and professional resources, such as therapy, coaching, or mentorship, to resolve these issues and pave the way for sustainable growth.

Cultivate Authenticity and Integrity

In your Phoenix Journey, prioritize authenticity and integrity. Reject societal pressures to conform, and instead, align your personal values with your professional endeavors. This genuine approach will garner respect and admiration, and ultimately lead to greater success.

Strengthen Your Intellectual and Spiritual Foundations

Foster intellectual curiosity and explore your spiritual beliefs to achieve a holistic understanding of yourself and the world. This deeper connection will provide clarity and purpose as you navigate personal and professional challenges.

Align Your Actions with Your Goals and Values

To create a fulfilling personal and professional life, ensure your actions are consistent with your goals and values. Pursue meaningful work and relationships that contribute to your growth and align with your vision for success.

The Phoenix Journey is an ongoing, deliberate process that demands determination, self-awareness, and resilience. By embracing these principles, you can rise above adversity and create a life marked by personal and professional transformation, redefining yourself, overcoming obstacles, and excelling in every aspect of your life.

As you embrace your Phoenix Journey, I invite you to join my Our Highest Mantra community, a supportive and nurturing space dedicated to empowering individuals as they embark on their unique journeys of growth and transformation. Our Highest Mantra offers guidance, inspiration, and resources to help you navigate the complexities of life and realize your fullest potential. Together, we can create a collective of like-minded individuals, united in our pursuit of personal and professional growth, resilience, and authenticity. Visit our website to learn more, and become a part of our vibrant community.

As someone who's built and led national and international sales verticals, you know that having a high-performing sales team is essential to achieving your business goals. But what does it take to create such a team? While there are many factors at play, one key ingredient is often overlooked: self-discovery.

Self-discovery is the process of gaining insight into one's own strengths, weaknesses, values, and motivations. It's about understanding who you are, what drives you, and how you interact with others. And it's not just a personal development tool – it can also be a powerful driver of sales success.

Here's why:

Self-discovery brings about sales

Sales is all about understanding people – their needs, desires, and pain points. When you have a deep understanding of yourself, you're better equipped to understand others. You're able to build rapport, empathize with their challenges, and provide solutions that truly meet their needs. And that, in turn, leads to more sales.

Self-discovery illuminates your stance

Sales is often a game of persuasion – wanting someone to see things your way willingly and volunteering from their own free will. But to do that effectively, you need to understand all sides of the equation. Self-discovery requires you to take a hard look at your own biases, assumptions, and blind spots. By doing so, you're able to see things more clearly and make more informed decisions. And that, in turn, leads to more successful sales outcomes.

Self-discovery creates high-performing teams

To create a high-performing sales team, you need to hire people who are naturally intuitive and have shown a desire to self-discover. These are the people who will take the time to understand themselves and others, who will seek out feedback and coaching, and who will constantly strive to improve. They're the ones who will push themselves and their teammates to new heights, driving success for the entire team.

So if you want to create a high-caliber sales team, start by prioritizing self-discovery as a trait you look for in prospective hires. Encourage your team members to take time for personal development, provide opportunities for coaching and feedback, and seek out candidates who have a natural curiosity about themselves and others. With self-discovery as a foundation, your sales team will be unstoppable.

Personality tests have become increasingly prevalent in the hiring process, attracting both proponents and skeptics. With the market for workplace assessments skyrocketing, it is essential to examine their true value as predictors of job success and their impact on decision-making.

Originating from the U.S. Army's efforts during World War I to identify soldiers prone to battlefield panic, personality tests have since evolved. One of the most widely known assessments, the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI), categorizes individuals into 16 distinct personality types. While the MBTI and other tests have gained popularity, questions arise about their scientific validation and efficacy.

On one hand, some hiring managers and researchers strongly support personality tests, viewing them as valuable tools for evaluating candidates' suitability for specific roles. They argue that personality traits, such as openness and conscientiousness, can provide insights into an individual's work ethic, integrity, and overall performance.

On the other hand, critics challenge the predictive power of personality tests, equating their accuracy to that of astrology. They argue that the self-reported nature of these tests poses inherent limitations. Individuals may present an idealized version of themselves or adapt their responses to align with social desirability, potentially distorting the results.

Another consideration is the situational nature of behaviors. Personality tests may not accurately capture how individuals behave in different work environments or during challenging circumstances. Personalities are nuanced and can adapt to specific situations, making it challenging to rely solely on a single assessment.

Moreover, the potential for candidates to manipulate their responses adds another layer of complexity. Applicants may feel compelled to present themselves in the most positive light, potentially exaggerating or fabricating their personality traits to align with what they believe employers seek.

While personality tests can offer some insights, their ability to predict job performance remains limited. Studies indicate that conscientiousness tends to be the most reliable predictor, accounting for around 20% of performance differences. However, the majority of performance variance comes from factors beyond personality traits, highlighting the need for a more comprehensive evaluation approach.

Furthermore, relying heavily on personality tests may inadvertently hinder diversity and limit opportunities for individuals with untapped potential. By placing undue emphasis on fixed personality traits, organizations may overlook candidates who possess the capacity for growth and development.

To navigate the complexities surrounding personality tests, a holistic approach is essential. Supplementing assessments with other evaluation methods, such as work samples and reference checks, provides a more comprehensive understanding of candidates' capabilities, work ethic, and potential fit within the organization.

By recognizing the limitations and biases inherent in personality tests, organizations can strike a balance between leveraging their insights and embracing a broader perspective of candidates' suitability for a given role. Ultimately, it is through a multifaceted evaluation process that organizations can identify individuals who not only possess the desired personality traits but also demonstrate the potential for growth, adaptability, and exceptional performance.

How do you incorporate personality assessments in your hiring process?

In my journey leading large corporate teams, I’ve discovered that integrating spiritual principles into the workspace can significantly transform the dynamics and productivity of the team. Spirituality, often perceived as a purely personal journey, has profound implications for collaborative environments, fostering both individual fulfillment and collective success.

One of the core tenets I’ve embraced is the creation of a diverse and inclusive team. Diversity in backgrounds, education levels, and perspectives is not just an ethical imperative but a pragmatic strategy for innovation and growth. When I led my team to contribute 70% of the company’s revenue, growing the firm from $30 million to $7.7 billion, it was the synergy of diverse energies and ideas that drove our success.

I employed principles of neuro-leadership and NLP coaching to create an intimate, collaborative space for the team. Regular meetings, mantras, and meditation sessions were central practices, aligning our energies and reinforcing a shared mission. We developed a universal language within the team, bridging differences in faith and beliefs, and empowered each member to make decisions aligned with our core values.

Celebration played a pivotal role in our approach, balancing the intensity of our work with joy and liberation. While celebration is not immediate and cannot be forced, it emerges organically when the team aligns and commits to a shared vision. This practice is crucial in maintaining a harmonious and productive work environment.

Language and energy are powerful tools in communication and leadership. Being mindful of how words shape the energy of a room, I emphasized coming from a place of objective energy and honesty. This approach not only fosters trust but also cultivates a genuine connection among team members, essential for meaningful collaboration.

In conclusion, integrating spiritual principles into leadership is not just about enhancing productivity but about creating a work environment that values human connection, diversity, and the pursuit of a shared purpose. It is this holistic approach that leads to sustainable success and fulfillment for both the individuals and the organization.

There were at least 228,000 layoffs from more than 1,000 tech companies in the past year, according to Layoffs.fyi, a website that has been tracking tech layoffs since 2022. The website's tallies are likely an undercount since most layoffs don't get reported.

I myself was part of my former company's 8th layoff cycle as of last week Friday after 7 years of strong performance. Losing a job is never easy, but handling it with class can make a significant difference in overall well-being and in your future career prospects.

I've had some time now to reflect on my own state of being as I processed through my career transition, and during that time, I wrote down 8 simple steps to help myself manage being laid off with dignity and grace.

Here's what I wrote.

Accept the reality: The first step in dealing with a layoff is to accept that it has happened. During this first stage, feel whatever emotions you need to feel through. If you're angry, accept the emotion and move through it. If you're feeling sad, allow the emotions to flow through you. This is the hardest stage to move through, but that's why it's the first step. It's important to acknowledge the situation, your emotions, and then move forward.

Stay calm: Prolonging anger or frustration won't help you in the long run. Instead, once you've moved through step one, now it's time to remain calm and professional during the transition. This will help you plan out your next steps clearly.

Take care of yourself: It's important to prioritize your mental and physical health during this time. Exercise, eat well, and take time for self-care. Seek support from friends and family if needed. Don't be afraid to treat yourself. Just because you received some bad news doesn't mean you don't deserve to still feel good about yourself.

Gather information: Ask your former employer about severance packages, unemployment benefits, and any other support available. Make sure you understand what resources are available to you and how to access them.

Update your resume and online profiles: Take advantage of this time to update your resume and online profiles. Highlight your accomplishments and skills, and focus on how your experience can benefit future employers.

Network: Reach out to former colleagues and connections in your industry. Attend networking events and conferences. Keep a positive attitude and be open to opportunities. You may be approached with opportunities you've never considered before, be open to everything the universe has in store for you.

Stay positive: Being laid off is discouraging, but it's important to stay positive and optimistic. Focus on the opportunities that lie ahead and be open to new possibilities. There is so much opportunity out there, it might be hard to imagine right now, but it's true. You will find a new opportunity. Rest assured there is something out there for you.

Seek professional help: If you are struggling with the stress and emotional impact of being laid off, don't hesitate to seek the help of a professional. A therapist, career counselor, or life coach can provide valuable support and guidance during this time.

Handling a layoff with class will help you regulate your thoughts and emotions, maintain your reputation, and make a smooth transition to your next opportunity. By accepting the reality, staying calm, taking care of yourself, and remaining positive, you will demonstrate your resilience and strength. You will remind yourself how powerful you really are, and future employers will feel that strength in you and move forward with confidence.

And as always, please remember that you are worth more than your title, your salary, and your career history.

On this International Women's Day, I want to highlight the importance of honoring the diverse experiences of women in the workplace and share my own experience over the past decade. We've made progress, but we still have a long way to go and I can personally attest to that. Women make up nearly half of the workforce, but only 7.4% of Fortune 500 companies have female CEOs. Women are also more likely to experience gender discrimination and sexual harassment at work, with 42% of women reporting experiencing gender discrimination and 81% reporting experiencing sexual harassment.

Even among women, those who display more feminine or masculine traits may face unique challenges in the workplace. A study conducted by Catalyst found that women who display feminine traits, such as being nurturing and empathetic, are often perceived as being less competent and are less likely to be promoted.

On the other hand, more androgynous or masculine women may also face discrimination and challenges in the workplace. A study by the University of Surrey found that women who display more masculine traits, such as being competitive and dominant, are often perceived as being less likable and less socially skilled.

Queer women also face obstacles in the workplace. According to a report by the Human Rights Campaign, 46% of LGBTQ employees in the US are not out at work, with many fearing discrimination and negative consequences for their career. This can lead to feelings of isolation and invisibility in the workplace.

Women of color also experience significant challenges in corporate America. They are more likely to experience discrimination and harassment at work and are underrepresented in leadership positions, with just 4% of C-suite positions being held by women of color, a study by LeanIn.Org and McKinsey & Company found.

As an LGBTQ woman of color, I've always felt like I had to work harder than anyone else to prove my worth in the workplace. And when I became a senior leader, that feeling only intensified. Despite working my way up the ladder, receiving top marks on all performance reviews, and having metrics to back up my accomplishments, I was still constantly sized up by my peers, both male and female.

I know that many women, regardless of their background or identity, have had similar experiences in the workplace. That's why it's so important for us to remind each other that we're all on the same team. Together, we can create a more equitable and supportive work environment for everyone.It's not easy, but it's necessary if we want to break down the barriers and create a more equitable workplace for all.

So on this International Women's Day, let's honor the diverse experiences of women and work towards a more inclusive and supportive environment for everyone. As Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie famously said, "We should all be feminists." Let's live that truth and create a better future for ourselves and the generations of women who will come after us.

If you're looking for a personal or professional coach to help you reach your goals, I provide personalized coaching services to help you find your voice and unlock your full potential. I also offer consulting services to companies looking to create more inclusive and productive work environments. By focusing on diversity, equity, and inclusion, I help businesses cultivate a workplace culture where everyone feels valued and empowered to succeed.

And for those seeking to explore their spirituality and practice self-care, be sure to check out Our Highest Mantra, my platform for empowering people to reach their higher selves.

Personal growth and self-improvement often focus on achieving, doing, and being more. But my success wasn’t founded on my external pleasures; it was the quiet, introspective moments of Conscious Self-care that brought me here today. My shift into daily mindful self-observation is the basis for my personal and professional transformation.

For years, fun for me meant external excess. I lived a life many envied, surrounded by aesthetic pleasures and relative financial autonomy. Spending $15,000 on birthday celebrations in my early twenties was normal. On the surface, it was fun. But beneath that, I was using these distractions to avoid facing an internal void that I didn’t even know existed.

Realizing I was numbing myself with substances and superficial engagements was a turning point. Success isn’t measured by the ability to spend money or the beautiful company that surrounds you. True success is the ability to enjoy one’s own company, to be alone and celebrate.

This realization led me to Conscious Self-care, a deliberate practice of simplifying my life to focus on what matters. This wasn’t about giving up worldly pleasures but about changing my relationship with them. It meant transforming chaotic parties into harmonious gatherings of thought and reflection.

The shift from hedonism to conscious self-care was gradual. It required commitment to introspection and the courage to face parts of myself I had ignored. But the rewards have been immense and amplified day by day. Simplifying my life has taught me to appreciate the present moment, the true value of people around me, and my own worth.

Conscious self-care is not a luxury but a necessity, the foundation for true transformation. It's about making choices that align with your highest self, even when those choices require stepping out of comfort zones.

To those at the crossroads of change, remember the mantra: success and fulfillment don’t come from the pursuit of more but from appreciating and nurturing what you have. It’s about turning down the world’s volume to tune into your own mind. The celebration is much more enjoyable when you’re truly present.

An opinion piece by Sathi Roy about the toxicity that comes with the idea of ‘selflessness’ being a noble trait, how it promotes narcissism in others, and how we should shift our perspective and encourage others to be considerate, not selfless.

The term ‘selfless’ often carries with it highly positive connotations; someone who is selfless is seen as noble, caring, and giving.  Selflessness is a term that is celebrated, revered and treated as something we should all strive to be.

But should it be?

I don’t think being selfless is noble at all. In fact, I think it’s a toxic quality society pushes upon people to perpetuate narcissism in others. (In my opinion, Narcissism is a real epidemic.)

Let me explain.

Selflessness is defined as being ‘concerned more with the needs and wishes of others than with one's own.’ Therefore, an individual who is selfless regularly prioritizes others over themselves. Their own needs, wants, desires are relegated to the bottom of the list or dismissed entirely.

Does that sound noble?

Selflessness can be harmful because harm is being done to the individual who is continually performing selfless acts, putting the needs of others over their own. But this harm can be easily dismissed as the selfless person basks in the praise they receive from others. The more praise one receives, the more they feel they are doing what they are supposed to do. It’ll become a relentless cycle and before you know it, you don’t even know what you want anymore because you’re so used to self-sacrificing for others.

When it comes to selflessness, people always seem to pay attention to the positive being done to others, versus the negative being done to the ‘selfless’ giver. 

Selflessness creates and perpetuates narcissism in others.

How can it be healthy or in any way honorable for someone’s feelings to not matter? This type of thinking or behavior only leads to eventual misery and the loss of someone’s self-worth and sense of identity. 

Imbalance Is Never Good

When we think of the word selfless, we always think of giving. But what about taking? The imbalance of caring is where the problem lies.

By continuing to discuss selflessness in a positive way and placing selfless people on a pedestal — as something to emulate — we are actually setting the groundwork for others to be harmed.

This gets even worse when we consider that selflessness is a trait most often attributed to women.  Research from the University of Zurich revealed that male and female brains may react differently to what is called 'prosocial' (aka selfless) versus selfish behavior.

Let’s Consider ‘Considerate’

I propose that we all strive to be considerate instead of selfless going forward.

Being considerate means that we are respectful and mindful of others. It means we are acknowledging their views and experiences but we are not putting their needs over our own.

Being considerate instead of selfless calls out the elephant in the room: That the giver matters too.

Drawing Out Narcissistic Behaviors  

Another major problem with selfless behavior is that it can bring out narcissistic tendencies in others. A narcissist is defined as someone who has “an excessive interest in or admiration of themselves”.  It therefore makes sense that if someone is ‘selfless’, a narcissist will see an opportunity to take advantage of the person or situation.

Remember, everyone is capable of showcasing narcissistic behavior. I’m not only referring to those who are diagnosed with the larger personality disorder specifically.

Happy and Strong People Are Not Selfless

Rather, they consider the needs of others in their decisions. They are respectful and mindful of others, but they also think of themselves.

It is time for us to replace the term ‘selfless’ with more positive and non-destructive terms such as considerate. ‘Selfless’ essentially means the destruction of one’s self, which will never be good.